January 22, 2020

The feinting kind anyway. 

We’ve all seen the videos of the poor creatures who start to run away and suddenly freeze, topple over and lay there stiff and paralyzed for a moment.  

Well there’s a version of that which occurs to many people every day, a product of overwhelm that causes a much more subtle effect, and mainly on the emotional body, but which can be very disorienting and ungrounding. It’s a toppling over of one’s tolerance for input, and a momentary necessity to hit the pause button.

I’ve been studying about trauma for the past year, and with more intensity for the past 6 weeks or so.  In February 2020 I will be entering into a new breathwork training that also incorporates a system for releasing trauma from the tissues in the body. This work is something very close to my heart because I have seen so many people through my years of work in a one on one setting, whose systems are on constant overload due to the buildup of intense, unprocessed emotional overload. I observe t...

October 5, 2017

Thanks to Poetry Club at HoneyLa, poetry has become a more regular thing in my life.  Not just prompts and occasional suggestions, but lately I am looking for the poetry in life all the time.  The way my heart knows it should be. The way I always did before I began this adult thing full time so many years ago.   This one is from a prompt: "where do you see/feel/experience God the most in your life?"  And of course I went straight to the breath because, well, anyone who breathes on purpose cannot help but feel the presence of God.   Here are my reflections.  Enjoy :)

God The Most

Body of light

soft hairs

skin, nails, teeth, breath

God is in the physical,

the realm of Feeling.

God is in my hands

making contact with flesh

God is the shiver of receiving

and the overlap of 

divine humanness

When I close my eyes

sometimes I see colors

and geometric shapes

moving, arranging themselves

in and out of order and dimension.

I am inclined to think

God puts them there

My hands find the place o...

September 25, 2017

Dark was about 20 minutes away.  My mind reeled at pace with my body, lurching down with each step and cursing the steepness of the grade.  My knees were avoiding/ignoring sharp pains at each and every step, exhaustion had fully set in, and in addition to the nagging feeling in my gut of needing a pit stop, the dogs were also barking.  Loud.  

Through a deepening mental fog, the dialogue in my head was sounding something like this: “This hill is lasting forever.  I know I’m on the the home stretch.  This is my hill!  I’ve climbed to this ridge at least ten times over the last 8 months. My legs might actually be jelly spurting out from feet of fire.  What is going on with me?!  I feel so off right now….”   The other vague nagging notion that was present through the layers was the fact that I had been trying to conceive for the past week, and as of 36 hours ago I was pretty sure it was happening and frankly I was slightly worried.  All of this swirled around in my head as I...

August 21, 2017

Living near the ocean in Maine for over a decade, one may discover that there is a whole other rhythm to keep track of. For many years, my mind kept a quiet corner of awareness reserved for what the tide was doing.  “Is it too high to take the dog?”  Or, “the tide’s out, let’s go look for cool treasures!”  The slow filling and emptying always seemed like an obvious metaphor for breath, but I found that once I started looking, those metaphors were not very hard to find.  Yes, anything that expands and contracts and naturally falls into rhythm, anything that flows life in this nature is metaphor potential. But I have discovered one simple philosophy about breath which really seems to nail it for me: You live like you breathe, and you breathe like you live.

This is where you may stop and consider how you are breathing. Right now.  But also, how do you breathe all the time when you’re not paying attention? And how likely are you to yell at yourself about it? The most peculiar...

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